We haven't talked much lately
and I've seen you far less than I'd like
but I knew we were still friends
at least I had that.

I goofed up and said something stupid
and you got really pissed at me.
I realized I was wrong, and promised I'd watch what I do
and I apologized to you and him
but you didn't really care anymore
and I wasn't sure you accepted my apology
even though it was sincere
but I gave you the benefit of the doubt
because our friendship means everything to me.

And when you surprised me when you showed up last week
and prevented my talking to him
you didn't bitch me out
and I assumed everything was ok.
And as you were leaving, you hugged me
but you abruptly pushed me away
and I thought something was wrong
but I couldn't say anything about it
and I didn't realize it
and I was lost and confused.

You were talking today
about going out west
and I felt like I was losing you
even though there was nothing to lose
and then later on
when you said "damnit"
I asked you "what's wrong?"
I expressed concern
because you were my friend
and in response you said I was begining to really annoy you.
And all at once
my smile died
my hope vanished
my heart writhered completely
and I did not know what happened.

You were my best friend
the friend I held most dear
and I was one of your best friends too
and if I've done something
to hurt or upset you
I wish you'd please tell me.
I hate being treated this way
it brings back painful memories
and I don't want to deal with them.
Your friendship
means everything to me.
I value nothing more.
I hope we're still friends
but I don't know what to think
and I don't know what to do
and I don't know what to say.
So
please
tell me what happened.